A new kind of reasoning
This should not be a big deal, but when my adult son asked if I would commit to baby-sitting my grandson on Wednesdays, I made my decision by reasoning it through the way I thought father Abraham might have reasoned it—that is, by factoring miracle into my assessment.
I normally would have made a straightforward application of the familiar Bible principles of responsible time stewardship. I would have considered the list of my present responsibilities, and then number of hours in a day, and would have arrived, quasi-mathematically, at the conclusion that the proposal is “impossible.” Sorry, Jae.
This is inadequate reasoning for a Christian. Christian reasoning is always reasoning with a Person, not principles. And reasoning with a person is a thing richer and creative and surprising. It leaps beyond the empirical data. And when the Person with whom one has to do is the Almighty God, right reasoning makes room for miracle.
Abraham received a tougher request than mine. “Take your son, your only son, Isaac, … and … sacrifice him…as a burnt offering” (Genesis 22:2). A strict, as-the-crow-flies application of all the principles he could muster would have availed Abraham little.
To my great edification, Abraham took his starting point with a Person, not a principle. And starting with what he knew of that Person’s character yielded a revolutionary kind of reasoning: Hmm, Abraham reasoned, I guess this means God is going to raise my son from the dead (Hebrews 11:19).
As insanely as Abraham, I thought to myself when Jae asked me for my Wednesdays: Hmm, I’m really busy, but if God wants me to give my Wednesdays to my grandson, I guess that means He plans to make me more productive on Mondays, Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays.




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back to top26 Comments to “A new kind of reasoning”
so what kind of miracle are you expecting?
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I think she is believing God will make her other four days more productive.
Come on, Andree. Is it really a deep spiritual principle here or is it simply that most every grandma would clear her schedule for the opportunity to be with her precious grandchild?
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I don’t think most grandmas these days would jump at the opportunity to be with their grandchildren. It’s sad, but we all have become so selfish with our lives, our time, and our projects that even time spent with our progeny is a chore. But we can hardly fault grandparents when there are many parents who don’t want to spend time with their children.
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I’ll take Andree on her word and agree that there are many times this is true of the Christian. Sometimes we give when it seems like we cannot afford it. Sometimes we take time when it seems it is not there. Even giving up our right to revenge is a trust in God to right things in the end.
The time issue is a sad one, but a reality for many today. May God bless this time with your little one, Andree and give you great efficiency on the other days!
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I think it’s important for Christian grandmas (& grandpas) to spend as much time with their grandkids as possible, gently & lovingly sharing their love of & faith in the Lord. Especially if the grandkids’ parents aren’t.
Our dear VS (Vickie), who is now with the Lord, poured herself into her precious 2 grandkids in that way. Someone once said she should be doing something more “important” for the Lord than babysitting her grandkids. She felt, & I agreed, that babysitting those little ones was her calling from God at that time in her life.
The time she put into those kids will have eternal benefits.
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Karen O, I believe you are so right, which is why I am with a couple of mine right now. I have never regretted the time given to their moms. I don’t believe I will regret the time given to these precious children either.
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Something more important than shaping the life, character, training, manners, memories, traditions of a human being? I can’t think what that might be.
God bless you, Andree, and all the mothers and grandparents who have chosen to invest in their children and grandchildren and not in their own private hobbies and interests.
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This topic is one I wouldn’t have expected to hear from a Believer. Calculating hours and days? – as if personal time is more important than a grandchild?
My friends jump at the opportunity to spend time with their grandchildren.
Sad when people find it needful to consider themselves first, and only IF they can squeese in ‘others’ to they accept the ‘obligation’ rather than consider it a treasured opportunity.
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Thanks, Andree, as usual. Well done.
Often, we believers tend to get a bit overbooked, or a lot overbooked. We tend to pick up opportunities to serve based on what people tell us rather than listening to the still small Voice.
In my own life, I may have spent a total of six hours interacting with one of my grandsons, zero with the other, haven’t even met him. If we were in the same neck of the woods, I would hope it would be different. But they live in Florida and I live in Idaho. Distance and finances separate us. Do I think I am doing wrong by not taking the next flight over? Not at all, I do believe I am serving the living Christ in the way He calls me, where I am.
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M – 9
Obviously you live a long way from your grandchild, Andree on the other hand doesn’t – its not a comparison when you live close by, ‘big difference –
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Victoria – In Andree’s defense, she is a widow who has to make her own living. Unfortunately, there are a lot of grandmas who work these days & can’t watch their grandkids.
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Karen
If that were the case there would be no decision to make. Instead there was a choice – I read it over to make sure it was a choice not something her son asked her to do, KNOWING it might be taking her away from her job.
I don’t know anyone who would expect their mother to stay home from her job and take care of their child. It makes NO SENSE!
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Not sure I would jump at the opportunity if they were closer. Not all is as simple as it seems. I would love to have an active positive part in the formation of my grandchildren, beyond what I had in developing their father, but that does not mean I am to be stepping in now just because it would be available.
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M – 13
If that’s the way you feel, maybe the other grandmother will be joyful to help out, in such a situation comes about.
I thought you loved taking care of kids – don’t you have about 6 or more ‘foster care kids’ you feel deeply over?
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Yes, I do. But just because I care deeply for children does not mean the Lord wants me taking over somebody else’s responsibility. The children I have in my care are children that have nobody. My grandchildren have many loving caring relatives of whom I am but one. The other grandmother is indeed very much involved in their lives, I am glad for her and for them.
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M – 15
Well then it looks like you don’t have to concern yourself since they have someone else who cares for them and takes the time to grandmother them.
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Andree probably has a somewhat flexible working schedule. According to an interview with her from two years ago, “Andrée Seu is a senior writer for WORLD Magazine, instructor at the World Journalism Institute, and a graduate of Westminster Theological Seminary, where she manages the cafe.” The classes would have set times, and probably the cafe also, but the writing can most likely be rearranged according to other items in her calendar. It still will take a certain number of hours a week, however, so agreeing to babysit doesn’t “take her away from her job” – it means she has less time left in the week to get the same amount of work done.
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There are many different types of grandmothers. She is one. I am another. She lives in Arizona and does not hesitate to make the trip when the kids are born. I am glad my DIL has her available.
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M – 18
YOU WRITE:… “She lives in Arizona and does not hesitate to make the trip when the kids are born. I am glad my DIL has her available.”
I am too, it would be sad if she and your son didn’t have someone to depend on.
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Not to worry, Victoria, son knows he can depend on me.
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Unfortunately, grandmothers who jump to clear their schedule are rare. If you know some, please encourage them in their good work.
Choices come in all different sizes to swallow.
Some think they are left with no choice after they’ve chosen non-essential activities.
Some make sacrificial choices, denying self, and picking up a cross that they actually find joy in.
I can’t remember where I heard it, but I remember a grandmother who felt exhausted, and her DIL, who rarely/never asked for such favors asked at a most un-oportune time. She “had” to say no, until she realized she hadn’t asked God for strength to do it. What a reserve He has for us!
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#17 Victoria,
Just FYI: She lost the cafe at least a year ago and had side jobs such as teaching English at a Christian high school (she lost that job for sending a photo of her class to a prisoner she is writing), correcting essay tests and I believe editing.
Yikes. Reading Andree is like reading “For Better or For Worse”. But I admit, I like both. (OK, I Like Andree better. FBOFW kids are too perfect.)
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As a person who is not a religious believer, I don’t find the story of Abraham and the willingness to sacrifice one’s son by an order of God very convincing. Lots of people think they are getting messages from God. They are very sure.
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Hi Jennelle
I enjoyed reading your post. I believe family comes first, and that means parents, siblings, children and of COURSE grandchildren. I would have been devasted had my mother not jumped up and and offered to come, care for, or help us, along with my dad.
Mom and dad had many activities (pastor) but they were never to busy to accept all of our children – ANYTIME. When my dad died, my mother was caring for my siblings two sons (he died within a half hour of a sudden heart attack) The elder had the privelege of the last one to talk to my dad, as they waited for the ambulance — they talked about his ministrey, his life – My dad didn’t talk about us kids, he talked about the ministry, giving out the Gospel. As he lay there taking his last breath, my mother whispered to him that I had told her “tell papa I love him” — those were the last words my dad heard. He was surrounded by his grandsons and my mom – no one ever imagined he would die that night, but GOD had arranged that his oldest grandchild sit by his side and watch him pass on to the LORD our GOD.
Grandparents are so important to kids, all the time that a grandparent can spend is valuable. My grandmother was my joy, she loved so much, my memories are vivid, she was a REAL testimony and example to me for life. We never know when the opportunity will no longer be there.
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I thought the hoped for miracle is the passing on of the faith to the grandchild, Ps. 103: 17-18
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oy vay!! sorry you got clobbered on this one, andree!
keep writing. please don’t grow weary in well doing because you are reaping already in this season in spite of sometimes getting clobbered.
the gist of what you said is worth me repeating:
“This is inadequate reasoning for a Christian. Christian reasoning is always reasoning with a Person, not principles. And reasoning with a person is a thing richer and creative and surprising. It leaps beyond the empirical data. And when the Person with whom one has to do is the Almighty God, right reasoning makes room for miracle.”
i needed to be reminded of this today! thank you.
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