I don’t know the church you are affiliated with but not all retreats end up in a group hug, or any other sort of hug-a-thon – the reason I know this is because my father was a pastor, and the male member’s of my family are not retreat/huggers as though that is the end result of a ‘men’s retreat’ – It appears your experience is very different from the normal response any of my male relatives have encountered – that of course doesn’t mean hugging isn’t a good thing, it just means it was not something which the men in my family or those close to me encountered.

My husband and I have been involved with husband/wife retreats, they were great, chores such as housework never came up, it was about the Word of GOD. Xion, perhaps you have been attending retreats, etc., which cater to very immature couples who need nurturing as young married kids who were not equipped from the ‘get go’ -

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I went on a number of men’s retreats, but they inevitably ended up with lots of crying and hugging. I never really understood what all the sobbing was about. If you’re sinning, then cut it out and move on. No sense blubbering and honking your nose on my shoulder. As Paul said, “Acquit yourselves like men; be strong”. (1 Cor 16:13)

I went on a couple of marriage retreats with my wife. But both really catered to females asking men to do more housework and such, as though there were something spiritual in it.

The best retreats are when my wife and I read scripture together.

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Meeting people, getting to know them better at ‘Retreats’ is not a “pretend relationship” – many times people meet one another at gatherings and are blessed by the conversations, and interaction. They might never see one another again in their life, but the time they shared, perhaps a burden or need in their life by praying together is never forgotten.

Reaching out to many people, not just close friends is what we are to do as Believers – there are more people in this world then are best friends. Lonely people need attention too, sometimes they go to a ‘Retreat’ just to mingle and share their lives, – what a joy to meet such a person and befriend them -

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It is real relationships, daily relationships, regular relationships with the godly that sustain us, that are used of God.

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I remember one ‘Retreat’ in particular, I had the privilege of getting to know a friend much better. I was on the committee for this particular Retreat, had already made plans to room with a another very good friend. It was a rather large group of women, most of whom I knew, at least a little. As it turned out I ended up inviting a woman (older than I, with two teens) to join me for a late night coffee desert social one of my friends had planned. We went, laughed, I introduced her to everyone I knew. When the party was over we were still talking so I invited her back to my room to talk – My room-mate said she was tired, and going to bed.

My friend told me a lot about her life which I didn’t know. She had strayed from the LORD. We talked very late, I told her how much the LORD meant to me, I asked her if she wanted to re-dedicate her life to Christ, she was only to happy to do that. We prayed together, it was wonderful. I happen to look over into the next area where my room-mate was ’supposed to be sleeping’ and there she was making a sobbing noise. My friend left and went to her room – my room-mate had been praying, she heard the whole conversation.

My point in telling this story isn’t to tell you how much I learned, but to share how much we need to fellowship with others. Retreats often allow us to share and listen to others because we have the time, we can stay up late, get to know each other on a much deeper level, breaking through to what’s inside another – it was a wonderful weekend, we were so blessed, I might never have had that opportunity had it not been for such a Retreat. YES I learned a lot!

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It took me all day to see that. What a dimbulb.

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I spoke at a retreat in April on rest and came home needing one.

I get so distracted by “real” life that an opportunity to stand outside of myself and day-to-day activities would be a relief.

Not to mention I’d leave behind all the broken appliances . . .

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