TRS – 151

YOU WRITE: “I simply refer you to your own words: “when people look at we who are as Christian Evangelicals and see us as being so strident, unbending and unkind, they turn away, maybe in sorrow or just plain disgust . . .”

TRS, take the time to look at that statement I made in post #133 in context, instead of trying to use it against me to your advantage- its a cheap shot –

When I observe this staunch lock-step approach, I’m not surprised when people look at we who are as Christian Evangelicals and see us as being so strident, unbending and unkind, they turn away, maybe in sorrow or just plain disgust. ______

NOW LETS READ THE REST TRS, not your selected line out of context to use as a whipping cord against me ______

Our witness as Christians Believers should encompass everyone — public school is not a church, too many people in many areas across America are forced in unsafe, lower income areas to send their children to sub-standard unsafe public schools, this SHOULD NOT BE. For those of us who live to the contrary I do believe it is a challenge, to show respect and kindness to others who don’t have the advantages we have. Remember one thing Fuzzyface, there will ALWAYS be public school – shouldn’t that challenge the Church of Jesus Christ to reach these kids for HIM?”

As a teacher, I would have imagined you to keep things in context, and to encourage your students to do likewise, maybe that only applies to others, not you?

Very different when you put this in context – You can’t admit you are wrong, so you switch and bait back to something which is another personal attack. You and your friends can stick together and accuse me of whatever makes you feel better, it will have no effect.

YOU WRITE: “My apologies for upsetting you. I really do know better. And, to everyone else, I apologize for continuing to try to explain something when I knew it was a lost cause, leading to some less than flattering views of Christians and their interactions.”

You have not upset me at all TRS, but you have opened my eyes to how many feel in their hearts about people who live in areas such as La Jolla – It wasn’t a “lost cause” TRS, it was your ASSUMING to know things which you have no knowledge of.

Make no mistake, you haven’t explained anything, you’ve stuck your foot in it, and now you want to switch and bait, it’s an old game.

First you used the excuse of “money” which I never mentioned, and when that didn’t work you decided to discuss La Jolla, and since that didn’t work you have used a very small partial quote I made to try and salvage whatever you can from your accusations against me.

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I simply refer you to your own words: “when people look at we who are as Christian Evangelicals and see us as being so strident, unbending and unkind, they turn away, maybe in sorrow or just plain disgust . . .”

As Cheryl pointed out, this is consistently how you come across in this blog. Sometimes, you can be really nice, but you are about as strident and unbending as just about anyone I’ve ever run across. And, sometimes, you can be very, very unkind. Assumptions run both ways.

As for my point, you seemed to have missed that entirely. I would try to explain it again, but I fear it would just be more time and result in the same.

My apologies for upsetting you. I really do know better.

And, to everyone else, I apologize for continuing to try to explain something when I knew it was a lost cause, leading to some less than flattering views of Christians and their interactions.

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TRS – 147

YOU WRITE: “If I am wrong about where you live specifically, I do remember from previous posts that you live in an area very like La Jolla, and so I just don’t buy the diversity argument.

The one or two poor, non-white children that a kid might “associate” with in such areas does not count as “diversity.”

Whether you buy my statements or not is your choice, however you are now accusing me of being untruthful, which I am not. The area in which I live is diverse, you my dear do not know what you are talking about.

I’m not going to give you the name of the city in which I live, its none of your business. However, your comments point up a very prejudice view that people come to when they have none of the facts and ASSUME they know that of which they are ignorant. It’s a shame TRS that you think I would be untruthful. I don’t live a double standard life, sitting on the fence regarding the Bible and my life as an example.

Your statement and remarks about me are disapointing, however I should have known better than to have expected anything more, what a shame.

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TRS – 146

YOU WRITE: “And, lest I don’t look as if I know what I’m talking about:http://www.lajolla-california-relocation.com/demo.htm”

The information from the link above is laughable – The figures aren’t correct even for 2001 – the home prices were much higher and the incomes as well – the interesting part of your little LINK? – the ethnic groups are much higher, in fact the figures which your untitled undocumented material comes from is a joke. You may have lived near La Jolla, but you certainly were not acquainted with those who live there or their ethnic backgrounds.

There are a lot of people who are jealous of those who live in La Jolla – however they never take into consideration the enormous amounts of money which these people give so that hospitals, clinics and research will go on helping others – that completely goes over their heads, all they can see is the lovely homes. The rest of the list is nonsense, such as:

    “Residents are older, married couples, and cosmopolitan. They drive luxury cars and visit museums. drinking wine, and ordering by phone.”

Who concocted this? – Most people of any ethnic/socio/economic group order by phone, and have for YEARS, drink wine, visit museums and countless numbers of people drive luxury cars, there are many 30 – 50 year olds who own and live in La Jolla, again your LINK isn’t true – - – - this is probably one of the silliest lists I’ve ever read, and this is your defense? – LOL

The second link is no better – home prices have gone down, just like every other city in CA.

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TRS – 145

YOU WRITE: ” #130 You live in La Jolla, Calfornia…right? I remember from a long ago thread.

WRONG, I don’t live there – I have had close relatives who have lived in many areas of California, La Jolla being one of them.

YOU WRITE:I lived in San Diego for much of my life. I know about La Jolla. I went to UCSD (which is in La Jolla). There is a reason that I brought up money in relation to La Jolla. If you have people living around you that don’t have money, they are few and far between. (And, likely working as maids, or some other sort of servant, because they are unlikely to own property there.)”

Even if I did live in La Jolla your snide remark about money was uncalled for in post #129.

– - – - – - AS YOU WROTE in post 129.

TRS – 129 YOU WRITE: “And, honestly, when you yourself admitted that only those with money can even buy homes in your school district, are you really going to keep trying to say that the students in your local public schools are *really* interacting with a diverse group of students?”

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Kids in your neighborhood are — for the most part with a few minor exceptions — associating with other wealthy, White, upper-class children of privilege.

If I am wrong about where you live specifically, I do remember from previous posts that you live in an area very like La Jolla, and so I just don’t buy the diversity argument.

The one or two poor, non-white children that a kid might “associate” with in such areas does not count as “diversity.”

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http://www.lajolla-california-relocation.com/demo.htm

“Dominant Characteristics: The people in La Jolla are in the Top One Percent economically.

These are the wealthiest neighborhoods in the United States. Residents are older, married couples, and cosmopolitan. They drive luxury cars and visit museums. They rank highest on most consumer expenditures with families being married couples in their peak earning years. This highly educated type is the top-ranked group for investments, drinking wine, and ordering by phone.”

La Jolla also has less than 1% of Blacks, and only about 2% Mexican-Americans…and, this in a state where Mexican-Americans are the majority in many areas. It is not particularly diverse ethnically, unless you’re counting white persons from various European countries.

And, http://www.bestplaces.net/zip-code/La_Jolla-California-92037.aspx

In addition: “The median home cost in La Jolla (zip 92037) is $1,417,750. Home appreciation the last year has been -29.60 percent.

Compared to the rest of the country, La Jolla (zip 92037)’s cost of living is 216.60% Higher than the U.S. average.”

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You live in La Jolla, Calfornia…right? I remember from a long ago thread.

I lived in San Diego for much of my life. I know about La Jolla. I went to UCSD (which is in La Jolla). There is a reason that I brought up money in relation to La Jolla.

If you have people living around you that don’t have money, they are few and far between. (And, likely working as maids, or some other sort of servant, because they are unlikely to own property there.)

There have been some apartments built there in the last number of years, but even they are pretty ritzy, and certainly don’t have a lot of lower class persons living in them.

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Victoria, some people’s parents really would have been better off to NOT be parents. And, even good parents goof up and it doesn’t help to pretend they don’t, so long as we show grace for it.

As someone who has been in public schools, taught in public and private schools, and had my kids in private school until they were homeschooled, I am one of the last to tell anyone that they HAVE to homeschool.

I truly believe that different kids have different needs…often even having different needs at different times in their lives.

If we could have afforded it, we MIGHT have put my oldest in one of the Christian private schools in the area for his last year of high school. NOT for the academics (they aren’t well-known for it), but the school does have a good heart, and he already has enough credits to graduate high school if he wanted to.

I won’t get into it more, but the thought of putting him in school for the last year was just so that he could have more fun. Unfortunately, we just can’t afford it.

However, having taught in public schools, and even in “good schools”, I know that is not where I want my kids. Still, I can imagine situations where I might have to put them there. And, I realize that some kids are definitely better off there than at home. I taught kids who had parents that I wouldn’t have let babysit a houseplant, and who should never have had kids of their own.

So, they certainly shouldn’t have been home schooling!

But, it does bug me when people pull out the stereotypes about home schooling. And, more, having worked in public schools, and had a family heavily involved in public schools, it bugs me when people are so unaware of how poor they can be — even the “good” ones, especially on a child’s world view. (My dad taught for 40 years. My mother was a teacher’s aide for 20. My sister and SIL still teach in public schools.)

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My parents taught me honesty – or at least they tried to. It never occurred to them than I might lie, since for the most part I was very honest. So when I chose to lie they never questioned it, because of course they knew I was honest. It was my fault I lied, but wiser parents might have considered the possibility that I was not perfectly honest. My mother expressed surprise, when as an adult I admitted this, because she had apparently thought I was perfect. I knew I wasn’t, but I couldn’t imagine talking to my parents about it. My mother suspected that I was the reincarnation of her mother, and turned to me for advice and comfort. My father just buried his nose in a book when he wasn’t at work or doing volunteer work.

They also taught, by their example, to take care of the people in society that other people ignore. We never had any company who were “normal,” only people who were blind or deaf or retarded or in wheelchairs, including one who was incontinent and always smelled of urine. I resented having them over so often, or going out to picnics with them. I knew I should feel compassion for them, but I didn’t. I felt guilty about it, but didn’t know how to change.

That was what led to my becoming a Christian, because I knew I was proud and selfish and unloving, and I wanted God to change me. My parents thought the Bible-believing church I started going to was a bunch of narrow-minded bigots, who did terrible things like telling other people they would go to hell if they didn’t believe in Jesus Christ. But they were surprisingly open to my going there, saying – as with all other decisions – it was up to me to decide for myself. They didn’t approve, precisely because they did think everyone should choose their own way to God without being told they’d go to hell if they chose a different way. But they left that choice up to me.

If they had tried to homeschool me, I think it would have been a disaster, both because of their faults and mine. My mother once said I should be interested in something besides getting better grades than the rest of the class, and in 8th grade agreed with my science teacher’s comment on my report card that he’d like to see me interact more with other students, but aside from that they rarely if ever tried to correct me.

It wasn’t until I was in college that an RA and later a professor talked to me and made me realize just how proud and selfish I was. I mean, I knew I was, but I didn’t realize how much it came across in my words and actions. I had come to faith in Christ a few years earlier, and tried to grow spiritually but without much inward change. I was unfortunately too good at doing well at outward things like memorizing Bible verses and being faithful in attendance at church and youth group, and being involved in whatever outreach programs we had, and giving my testimony in church. So people thought I was a pretty good Christian, and even though I knew I wasn’t, it was too easy to enjoy impressing people by reciting lots of bible verses.

Then my Spanish prof in college made me take a good look at myself, and I was very ashamed, and for the first time really felt awful about my sin and really grateful for forgiveness. I wish now someone had done that for me earlier in life, but I was too good, I guess, at giving the impression of the perfect daughter and perfect student. Yes, that was my fault, but like any child I needed correction. I didn’t get it at school, but at least I had examples there of adults who were not only honest and generous like my parents but also had reasonably good social and emotional skills, which my parents did not. (I’ve talked elsewhere about my father’s violent rages and my mother’s depression.)

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