Comments on: Fresh data on cohabitation

By: Fuzzyface

Fuzzyface — Sat, 11 Jul 2009 21:19:00 +0000

Allen Wrench,

Some people have used that verse to say that they were ‘married in God’s eyes’. I don’t think that this idea conforms to scripture. Take, for instance, Jesus talking to the woman at the well, where John 4:16-18 (ESV) states:

Jesus said to her, “Go, call your husband, and come here.” 17 The woman answered him, “I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, “You are right in saying, ‘I have no husband’; 18 for you have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true.”

I think that it is clear in this passage that Jesus didn’t consider her married just because she was (apparently) cohabiting.

1 Cor. 6 acknowledges that some people join themselves just for physical reasons, but is saying that when one becomes a Christian he is one (in a sense, married) with God, and this passage is emphasizing the decadence of dishonoring that bond.

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By: Allen Wrench

Allen Wrench — Sat, 11 Jul 2009 18:55:09 +0000

Borrowing a great deal here from C S Lewis, we tend to forget (or ignore) that God tells us when a man and a woman join themselves in sexual union a new creature is formed. God does not say the couple must be married. If a man unites himself to a prostitute he becomes one with her in body. (1 Cor 6:16)

The dilemma, I believe, is that we do not properly nor fully understand what it means to “be one,” a “new creature.” Marriage is a holy union of a man and woman, approved and legitimized by God and honored by Him. To attempt to circumvent the blessing of marriage by “trying it out beforehand” dishonors God and defeats an eternal intent.

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By: rider500

rider500 — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 09:41:35 +0000

How do you spell Love? = c_o_m_m_i_t_m_e_n_t

How do you spell Marriage = MORE c_o_m_m_i_t_m_e_n_t

How does one resolve issues/problems? even More c_o_m_m_i_t_m_e_n_t

What’s the final result? FULFILLMENT

Well… at least we can commit to personal gratification. If it’s good enough for me… It’s good enough for me.

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By: montyfisherwoof

montyfisherwoof — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 02:41:52 +0000

I thought couples cohabitated so that the man could show the woman that he had enough sense to put the seat down? ? ? ?

Actually economics play a much much bigger role in all of this. While the cynics say ‘The moral fiber….. blah blah. And the other cynics say No need for a pretense….blah blah. The real reasons may be much much more complex. Painting the whole with one brush does not make sense. Certainly some are terribly immoral. Some are terribly pragmatic. Some are totally ignorant. Some just want to save money as they are scared of Barack Obama’s economy.
Frankly I pray for all of my tenants. No matter what the relationships are. I also do not make an immediate link that cohabitation is necessarily ’shacking up’. (For the ease of Democratic readers,,,, think of illegal immigrants….)

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By: KI

KI — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 23:26:47 +0000

I should say, I agree with you, that it is best if people obey God because they have changed hearts. However, many people have been helped to do what is right simply by knowing that it is the best thing for them in the long run or because it is a societal more.

It is important to get the truth out that not having sex outside of marriage is the best thing for individual and for society as a whole. There are a lot of reasons to say that is true. That message should get out there, although there are a lot of people who don’t want to hear it and will fight against it.

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By: KI

KI — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 23:20:04 +0000

Nacman09: I agree with you. (11)

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By: nacman09

nacman09 — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 21:23:41 +0000

Seems to me that that this survey only shows another symptom of the demise of the American moralist Christianity. Not to say the Christianity in America is dead, just the social pressure to subscribe to a Christian moral system. The only solution is a radical change in the individual souls of this (my) generation.

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By: hrw

hrw — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 21:01:21 +0000

I too am surprised economics isn’t the focus. Most university couple move in to save money. Basically the argument is we have sex anyway why keep up the hypocritical facade especially when it costs money.

The divorce rate is higher for common-law relationships that then marry. Its not morality (maybe bad karma) rather many people change their expectations when they get legally married. When one half of the couple changes expectation and the other doesn’t then conflict ensues.

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By: KI

KI — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 20:46:06 +0000

Most young people simply have no idea that living together before marriage has a lot of negatives. There is a reason for God to tell us not to do something and statistics bear that out when it comes to cohabitation. More people divorce after cohabiting and then marrying. More report less satisfying sex lives.

An interesting book that lends some idea why this happens is “His Brain, Her Brain” by the Larimores.

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By: sansend

sansend — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 20:44:47 +0000

If their religious beliefs tell then it’s wrong, and they act contrary to those beliefs, I don’t think their beliefs were really theirs,but their churches or their family’s beliefs.

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