An insomniac’s Psalm 103: Verse 1
If you have ever driven down a road at a good clip all your life, and then one day done the same stretch on foot, you have experienced the surprise of seeing things you never saw before in a familiar setting. Houses that were nondescript at 40 miles per hour suddenly reveal their charm. The homogenous blur of woods becomes the homey nooks and crannies of avian life, the foraging deer, the furtive fox.
I have never been a Scripture memorizer. But as I seem to have all the time in the world in the wee hours, I thought I would occupy it productively, and Psalm 103 looked to be a reasonable length. The Bible has been cracked open to that spot for many a night, and a neighbor happening to observe my bedroom window would be puzzled to see the fitful on-and-off of lights as I work my way through 22 verses.
Verse 1:
“Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name!”
I notice first of all that the psalmist is talking to himself. The whole psalm is, strictly speaking, a note to self—except for verses 20, 21, and 22a. Like the psalmist, I am learning the indispensability of self-talk. My fears talk to me all day, and so the truth must also. Someone once said, “What would you do to a friend who lied to you as often as your fears have?” Indeed.
I’m learning there are two kinds of counsel only in my head—the Spirit’s and the devil’s. The sphere of the “neutral” has shrunk to nonexistence for me. When James warns against “demonic” thinking, it’s interesting that in the context he is not referring to thoughts of murder or adultery but envy and selfishness. Everything tends God-ward or hell-ward.
I have become quicker at catching my little godless fantasies and rebuking them. I keep asking God to take every thought captive. It is my desire to be so filled with the Spirit that even my dreams and my spontaneous outbursts and my first reactions are spiritual. It is God’s Word itself that has emboldened me to seek in this direction.
Whether these verses are self-talk or Spirit-talk (it all becomes seamless when you’re filled with the Spirit), the psalm opens with a command: “Bless the Lord, O my soul.” And it is evident by the psalmist’s tone that the command is joyful. Who says commands are burdensome? Anyone who has tried it knows that to take a half hour walk thanking God for everything you can think of brings you home in a much better state of mind than a half hour of your mind left to its usual devices.
And if you bless God out loud, all the better. This is what I think the psalmist has in mind. Public praise is better yet. There is something of a different order of magnitude about praise that makes its way from the heart up to the lips. The angels are encouraged and the demons tremble, not to mention the effect you have on men.
“All that is within me” is a delightful qualifier. I have sometimes wondered if my desires for God are fanatical, but this verse puts that fear to rest. Everything I must do I will do. “All that is within me” means I set no time limit on answers to prayer. If He has not answered, and I have only an ounce of strength left, I will go on with that ounce of strength. If it comes to the point where I don’t have even an ounce of strength, we’ll talk about it then.
“Bless his holy Name.” His Name is a mystery to me. All I know is that it is so fearfully potent that Peter invoked it to heal a lame man, and later when he was interrogated about it, he gave double emphasis to its power: “His Name, through faith in His Name, has made this man strong” (Acts 3:16). And somehow, “The Name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous man runs into it and is safe” (Proverbs 18:10).
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back to top30 Comments to “An insomniac’s Psalm 103: Verse 1”
Wonderful post. The Hebrew word ‘Barak”: a primary root; to kneel; by implication to bless God (as an act of adoration)…
translated here as ‘bless’. I was in a church one Sunday when the speaker asked the congregation to share their meaning of ‘bless’. I asked if I could demonstrate the meaning. Having the speakers permission, I got down on my knees, and with oustreached arms put my face to the floor. How often do we do this (myself included)? Our God is an awsome God, worthy to be praised.
Blessings
Roger
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Blessings! Both from Andree and Roger. What a wonderful post is right!
I also identify so much with this post. I, too, fill my head with scriptures and awaken in the night going through them in my mind. I have prayed for years when I awaken, but the memorization has been a new thing for only the past several years. What a blessing it has been. Before, I memorized, but not to the extent I do now and not through the night. Even sleeplessness can be a blessing.
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I too suffer from insomnia. I have not found that boredom puts me back to sleep once I wake up.
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Keep reminding yourself, too, Andree, that you have been blessed with a sound mind.
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Another cheap shot, RN. Nobody mentioned boredom.
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Rather boorish of you, BTW, but I suppose you just couldn’t resist.
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KI: RN ’s whole reason for posting here is to take cheap shots.
He certainly has nothing of value to present, therefore his only jolly is to sneer and smear. Sad isn’t it?
Blessings
Roger
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KI: RN ’s whole reason for posting here is to take cheap shots.
He certainly has nothing of value to present, therefore his only jolly is to sneer and smear. Sad isn’t it?
Blessings
Roger
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Sorry for the double post.
Blessings
Roger
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I suffer from insomnia. I have read the Bible. I think most of it is boring. I don’t think it is the word of God. I don’t consider myself a “liberal” or a “conservative,” but I think people of both points of view often have interesting and useful comments to make.
I read many comments at worldmagblog that are mindlessly insulting toward “liberals” and “leftists” and so on. In a similar fashion I read many comments at worldmagblog that make insulting comments about Muslims and about homosexuals.
All of these comments could as easily be characterized as “cheap shots.” As the old saying goes, “a fish does not notice the water.”
I did not insult anybody. I did not violate Terms of Service. I did not call anybody a name or say that anyone’s post was boring or anyone’s comment was boring.
I simplied in a brief and subtle manner that the Bible is boring. At worst, this is a variation of the Danish cartoons that supposedly insulted Mohammed. To be fair, nobody called for Jihad against me. If Muslims did not exist, Christians might need to invent them so they could say somebody’s religion is more dangerous and offensive than theirs.
As I’ve mentioned, in the United States, for the most part Christians are not being persecuted or in danger of being persecuted. They are, at most, in danger of not being respected as much as they once were, or as they think they should be.
This is pretty thin gruel for martyrdom, folks. For that matter, if the best you can do is get worked up about a “cheap shot” in a brief and harmless comment to a silly post, you need to get a life, as the saying goes. Feel free to race me to the bottom. Chances are you will win.
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Good insights in this post. I’m off work this week and am going to meditate a bit more on “taking every thought captive.” That verse gives me pause.
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Ah, RN, what makes you think I’m worked up over it? Is every comment from someone indication they are worked up? I guess you are really, really worked up.
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KI, I am glad you are not worked up. Also, I believe what everybody at wmb tells me. Well, not quite everything. I don’t believe people are born of virgins or rise from the dead.
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I can hardly believe it!
Random Name in post No.3 makes a comment about his insomnia and that boredom does nothing to relieve it when he awakens. This innocuous observation calls forth two replies chastening him as sneering and boorish. It is no secret that RN is a harsh critic of Mrs. Seu. He readily admits to being an agnostic and if his is a fair analysis there’s hope that he will study both sides of this spiritual argument, pro and con, intelligently while there is yet time. He may assumes that Mrs. Seu accepts the Bible “kivver to kivver,” unquestioningly, uncritically, never having had to wrestle with her faith. No. She was forced to accept the early death of her husband then continue to raise their four children without a mate. She knows what it is to lose a job unexpectedly, balance an impossibly tight budget, live with family members who do not share her convictions (though some do), receive an implied suspicion of cancer (subsequently proved false), originate these blog posts and write an 800-word column for WORLD magazine. (NB: These comments do not thoughtlessly violate Mrs. Seu’s privacy; she has made all publicly available in her writings.) I believe when Mrs. Seu shares her thoughts from the Bible we do well to pay attention.
I do not often agree with Random Name’s observations here; a Christian and a non-Christian can safely talk about digestion and automobiles, but on matters of faith we walk different paths. Occasionally, his remarks are caustic and ill-advised, but I like to think that he frequents WMB to learn if there’s anything worthwhile going here besides sniping and arguing “you said,” “no I didn’t,” “read it again,” “I don’t need to read it again,” etc., etc., ad infinitum. If this WORLD magazine site is supposed to represent Christian views, then for heaven’s sake, people, let those of us who name the name of Christ act like it.
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RN: I believe that Jesus was born of a virgin by the power of the Holy Spirit who overshadowed her, and I believe that Jesus rose again on the third day and brought captivity captive. My gain, your lose. I continue to intercede for you, for I fear for your future.
Blessings
Roge
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AllenWrench, I’m sure RN can defend himself. He knows his comment was not innocuous. I stand by what I said.
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My sense is that RN is a bit edgier now that he’s saving up his posts for one or two days a week.
I’m thinking maybe he was nicer when he came here more often, perhaps with less pent-up intensity?
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KI (16): At risk of violating my own principle, that of continuing a pointless back-and-forth discussion, I cannot for the life of me see how anyone could connect a comment about insomnia and boredom when awake in a negative way to the original blog. Except for the reasonably close proximity of one to the other, RN’s comment is no more than a statement of his condition. I am in no way coming to his defense; I consider him and Mrs Seu quite capable of taking care of themselves dialectically. He and I need the same Defense Attorney, our Advocate Jesus Christ.
Mrs. Seu takes the high road, the one our Lord took when Pilate charged him: Aren’t you going to answer? See how many things they are accusing you of. But Jesus still made no reply . . .
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Thank you, Allen.
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However…#14
It is no secret that RN is a harsh critic of Mrs. Seu
Great oversimplification. I have read some of her posts I thought sensible and some I thought silly. I have had a few brief and polite exchanges with her through email.
She was forced to accept the early death of her husband then continue to raise their four children without a mate. She knows what it is to lose a job unexpectedly, balance an impossibly tight budget, live with family members who do not share her convictions (though some do), receive an implied suspicion of cancer (subsequently proved false), originate these blog posts and write an 800-word column for WORLD magazine. (NB: These comments do not thoughtlessly violate Mrs. Seu’s privacy; she has made all publicly available in her writings.) I believe when Mrs. Seu shares her thoughts from the Bible we do well to pay attention.
I have argued that Christianity is one of the most effective consolations for suffering ever developed. I have also said, that my life has gone better than I ever expected it to, and that perhaps the reason I am not a Christian is that I have not suffered enough. Perhaps Mrs. Seu has. I don’t wish suffering on anybody, and if anyone finds consolation in their belief, then I have no quarrel with that, though I do quarrel with the things I often quarrel about with many here.
My millionaire cousin became a Christian in Taiwan. She lived her life well and used her money well, and now is in a mild way, a national hero in Taiwan. As she lay dying of cancer, I hope her Christian belief brought her consolation.
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AllenW: If I had never heard of RN and had never read anything from him, I may have believed that he was just making an innocuous comment. However, I am not writing in a vacuum. All the previous writings of his that I have read (and I will admit I do not read them all) are part and parcel of what he is about.
I will refer you to his comment #81 on yesterday’s whirled views. I just don’t think of him as some weak little man who cannot take a simple opinion of mine. If he will come on here and say that yes, it was simply to be taken at face value, perhaps we can have a long discussion on the cures of insomnia. And I will certainly be willing to apologize for my terrible misunderstanding.
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KI,
I agree Random is hardly going to be put off by your response to him. I might have some concern about the reaction of a visitor here, though, who knew nothing of Random or the many interactions Christians have had with him on this blog over the years.
I admit that after your response to Random’s comment #3, I was relieved I hadn’t brought up my own thoughts regarding praying when I have trouble getting back to sleep. I’ve known quite a few other Christians – including one of our pastors – who admit to praying when they have trouble getting back to sleep because they know they’ll fall asleep. Not because I pray for sleep and God answers, but because somehow it’s easy to fall asleep while praying, even when I’m not trying to…
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Pauline, I have to agree with you that praying because it will make you fall back to sleep out of boredom is a appalling to me.
I began using my awake time when I was pregnant and too miserable to sleep. I would sometimes get up and actually read the scripture. When I nursed babies I would pray. Now when I have trouble and troubling thoughts come, I banish them by praying about those which need it and using scripture to bring more truth to my thinking. That is a help for me and others. The bonus is more truth in my heart for when I need it.
This is to me ‘working while it is light, because there are times when that will no longer be possible’.
I do not harbor any miswill towards RN and I have no reason to think vice versa, although we do disagree on many things. I would have no problem apologizing if I am wrong, however.
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KI,
I’m not sure I’d call it boredom. To me, boredom implies an awareness of being bored. When I fall asleep, whether praying or not, I have no awareness of doing so it’s only when I wake up that I realize I fell asleep, and remember what I was doing.
Some people point out that one should take comfort in the fact that falling asleep while praying (when one has been having trouble getting back to sleep) shows a trust in God, that praying brings such a peace of mind that sleep comes easily.
I tend to think of it more as turning my awareness away from external stimuli (sounds nearby, any physical discomforts, etc.), which often make it hard to get to sleep. I have no idea how much praying I actually get done before falling asleep, but my impression is that it’s not a great deal.
I used to lie awake in bed a long time, but ever since my first son was born I’ve been tired enough that it’s rarely an issue for me anymore. Staying awake when I’m not moving around physically is much more of a problem (whether it’s while I’m praying, sitting in church or a class or a meeting, even watching a movie or reading a book sometimes – including ones I enjoy).
But of course, I can’t help wondering sometimes whether boredom is more of a factor sometimes than I’d like to admit.
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KI (21): ‘Way back there in the beginning Random Name made this comment which I called innocuous for the simple reason that it was just that. You, unfairly, in my opinion, judged him for something you knew about him rather than what he said. I have written to RN at times over things he has said which I thoroughly disagree with (mainly about his disbelief in God). I know he can be difficult and cantankerous. He has referred to himself as a curmudgeon and no one has ever corrected him. If I were to say of myself that I served time for spousal abuse and robbery, neither of which is true, and then said that I liked roses and kittens, would you take it at face value or look instead for some underlying surreptitious motive? (And, BTW, if you ever tell someone that I once said something about spousal abuse will you be so kind as to include the denial phrase?)
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Pauline (22), and others: I have been known to pray as an antidote to sleeplessness and, like you, it rather bothered me until my pastor, a wonderful man, said he thought that God might be pleased to know that the last waking thoughts of His child were on Him.
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I will believe it was innocuous when he comes on and tells me it was. Until then, I will trust my judgement. You are entitled to your opinion that I misjudged him.
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Allen – I tend to strongly believe in giving someone the benefit of the doubt. But I have to admit that, like KI, I did not think Random’s comment was innocuous, in light of his other recent comments.
I could be wrong, though.
Hey, Random! Could you please clear this up for us?
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BTW, for what it is worth, I’m sorry I said anything. I thought RN might get a kick out of the boorish comment as it was a pun on being bored. I suppose he could be much more sensitive than I thought. I doubt it, but who knows? In that case I am really sorry.
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Oh, my gosh, what a turn – and turn again. Thank you AllenW.
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